• Your Words Matter (So Stop Calling Me A Pussy)

    I’ve always wanted to write a blog on this topic and since I recently saw a few articles (pertaining to yoga, nonetheless) using the word “pussy” as synonymous to the word “wimp,” I think it’s finally time. Even writing that word (as an insult) makes me cringe. Vaginas = Weak. Female = Weak. Every time someone says “he runs like a little girl” my heart breaks a tiny bit. I was once a little girl. And so was more than half the adult world.

    And guess what? Like my good friend once said, “vaginas are fucking strong. They push out babies. They bring life into this world.” So why do we keep equating them with weakness? Why do we keep devaluing our bodies and our gender?

    I’m tired of people complaining about the double standard between men and women, or saying, “of course women are never asking for it” and then afterwards using slut, whore, ho’, etc. in casual conversation as if it’s funny and cool. I’m tired of people claiming to oppose domestic abuse but then using their speech to promote violence against women. Words have power. They tell our beliefs. They voice how we see the world and what we want to see. We can use them as weapons or for peace. And women across the globe are being hurt by what these words mean, and by hurting us, the whole world suffers. Just watch Half The Sky on PBS.

    My solution: stop using words like slut and whore. When we use them (and “pussy” or “vagina” or “girl” as an insult) we are creating an atmosphere that only seeks to shame, silence and disempower us. Maybe if we stop using them, we can stop perpetuating a society bent on controlling women’s bodies and destroying feminine attributes. Maybe if we all stop using them, the biggest insult for a man won’t be to call him a woman. Maybe if we stop using them, it will no longer make sense to compliment a woman for being strong and tough like a man (“for having balls”).

    It is time to associate feminine qualities (which go beyond gender) of sensitivity, openness, and cooperation as signs of strength instead of weakness. In Half the Sky documentary, researchers found when women had more access to wealth, they were more likely to use it to support their families. Children were more likely to get fed and go to school. Also, female empowerment is equated with less terrorism and extremism.  So… Femininity is strong. And so are vaginas.

    AKA what he said—-> “You wanna be hardcore, dang, grow a vagina. Those things are built Ford tough, man. The vagina is like the Incredible Hulk of the human form. It does all the heavy lifting. You ever see a woman give birth to a child? You see that, you’re like, “That thing could lift a burning car if it had to.” If anything, the entire scope of masculine history has been an epic attempt at trying to convince the world that the vagina is tissue paper and our balls are titanium. It’s a huge and ugly ruse.”– Chuck Wendig 

4 Responsesso far.

  1. christine says:

    Funny Barbara, I love your passion but I honestly don’t make that connection…..I guess if you are unfamiliar with these words you might not take offense?!
    I always thought they were referring to a pussycat…a softie, when they said What a pussy! lol!

  2. Danielle says:

    I love this post! I have said it so many times myself, but here you’ve said it clearly and passionately. Thank you.

  3. larry says:

    when I did spouse abuse prevention(9-12 weeks) groups, we spent a session on words: calling your wife names like :cunt, jerk, stupid, or worse, are all forms of spouse abuse..Often it is done in the presence of children, friends, etc. and loud enough for neighbors to hear! Barbara is correct, we are able to do grave damage with our words.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers: